heavy heart

checked the website for the school i have applied to work at again today. the position i had applied for is no longer there. in fact, there are no postings for that school at all now. i sit, not really disappointed, but more like panicked at what to do. if you are reading this you know our situation. i know that i should just be trusting and faith should just bubble out. i have a heavy heart. your back would break if you knew how truly heavy this is. so i sit and ponder again. Jesus, just show up and show out. Amen and amen.