crazy hair and worship in my head

got my hair cut the other day. was sooooo excited until i went to pay. tried to give this stylist another chance. she used a ton of hairspray....more than i used in the 80's and added curls. i have no idea what she was thinking. i looked nothing like the pic. and i think i scared the girl at the register. all rinsed and gone by the time I got home and my ends are at least happy and singing. got andrew leading worship in my head without the band.... let us sing, louder than creation to You, for the pain you bore in your body, to bring my soul to You. (just our voices)

maintenance or miracle

most people go to the hair salon for one of two reasons... maintenance or a miracle. for 6 months i have neglected to maintain my hair. i have gone without a hair trim or cut. finally, after driving me completely nuts, i am going for an appointment on Wed. i am unsure of what i really want the end results to be. guess i am just wanting a miracle.

so many of us do the same thing spiritually. we don't maintain. we don't like the maintenance part and just prefer the miracle.

dilemma number 2 the shoe

shopping at the thrift store, she finds a shoe that fits her perfectly and wants it but the mate is missing. clutching it with dear life, she pillars through the stuff. when she notices another person who is looking for the other mate of HER shoe. they both become aware of it and neither lays one down. the game has begun. neither will leave, would die first. after 30 minutes and reality of not giving in, person number one hides her shoe and moves on towards the check out line. neither will win without the fight or a real easter egg hunt. person number one knows what she is doing isn't right, but if she can't have her way, why should the culprit of the mis mate shoe?

into me

saw you staring at me. wondered if i had a bugger on my nose or something in my hair.... and it could have been the hair. full attention made me feel strange. it was like you were peering beyond my appearance and into my soul. Lord you do really see me and it does make my feel guilty and unworthy. just want to be made right with You. stopped to water the rose bush and noticed a hopeful bloom.

blue thumb

trying to make a flower bed better, i dig, i pull and remove. i really don't have a green thumb. Nathan says my thumb is blue. and I know I don't have a clue. i trim and try to cut off what I think is dead. hopefully i am saving that shrub. it looks better in my opinion, but that is coming from someone with a blue thumb.

the rescue

Reading today in the Message

2 Cor. 1:4
He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us.

2 Cor.6:4-11
Don't frustrate God's work by showing up late.... Our work as God's servants gets validated - or not- in the details... People are watching us as we stay at our post, alertly, unswervingly... in hard times, tough times, bad times; when we're beaten up, jailed, and mobbed; working hard, working late, working without eating; with pure heart, clear head, steady hand; in gentleness, holiness, and honest love; when we're telling the truth, and when God's showing his power; when we're doing our best at setting things right; when we're praised, and when we're blamed; slandered and honored; true to our word though distrusted; ignored by the world, but recognized by God; terrifically alive, thought rumored to be dead; beaten within an inch of our lives, but refusing to die; immersed in tears, yet always filled with deep joy; LIVING ON HANDOUTS, yet enriching many; having nothing, having it ALL.

fruit of the land

picked strawberries again yesterday and i froze some... making a pie for a friend today. Nathan, Jon and I had a blast yesterday picking. had a million sermon ideas of my own popping through my head. couldn't help but to pray that more fruit would come from that place.... and i am not just talking about the kind you eat.

jon got to talking about how we as the church sometimes sit and soak and rot on the vine.... sure know how that feels. a church like that doesn't see its full potential or fruitfulness. the ones that are put into service can become something that they weren't. some are picked for pies, some for jams and some just to be themselves... yum.

there were weeds galore in the strawberry patch.... due to not tending. that made it difficult to find the fruit and took longer to pick. i am positive the weeds choked out the potential for a better harvest.

looking at the weeds in my own life. guess i need tending too. wanting my harvest to double and triple. so that i can eat of the fruit of the land.

willing to go with you God wherever you lead. the path seems weedy and i just can't quiet see the way or the fruit. would go through any open door you set for me, but i can't even see the door.

heart strings

tape measure in hand, i measure the shoe... wondering what size will fit. knowing the measurement of the shoes on the screen and now knowing how big your foot actually is gives me the answer. wondering how big my heart actually is, i try to measure something that i can't actually see. i am left measuring only what my heart has done or wants to do.... what other people can see or what remains covered... hidden in the depths of me.

big boy school

my week hasn't been bad. in fact i partly feel normal. nathan went and got 4 big boy shots on Tues so he can go to k in Aug. he went with me today and we registered for the big K. wasn't bad at all. even took a tour and saw Isaiah and Sam in their classes. time has flown. and now we are moving on to big boy school.

deep end

standing at the end of the diving board, wearing my size 5 swimsuit, swarms of emotions fill me. i am not crazy about even this height and not a big fan of swimming. i ponder what got me here to begin with. i am hot and really need a cool down, so i plunge into the deep, blue water and emerge with a deep breath. my skin all cooled now, i swim to the shallow end. when my foot strikes the concrete, i stop swimming and begin to wade around searching for the steps.

approaching the end

sitting comfortably in the back of an old pickup, i glance to my left and see you running and waving. you run parallel to the railroad track in hopes that you can catch the truck and embrace me. i wonder to myself who i am and who you are to even want me. even in this dream my heart cries... yet somehow you out run the truck and meet me there..... wherever there is. with arms open wide and a smile, i am captivated by your embrace. and i guess this is how i approach the end of my dream.

yummmmmm

went and picked strawberries today. yummmm. those things had to have fallen straight from heaven. nathan and i ate and picked. i think we will both be sick from eating too many. froze some for a rainy day too.

your serve

what's your serve looking like? are you willing to serve where God has you today or just where you want to be? service is not so much about where you are or why you are but that you are. it's my turn now. i will serve.